Friends, phobias and fulfillment

friendship gold stars

I truly have a wonderful life. It’s a hessian sack of golden stars, spilling over the rim. I feared I was neglecting the many wonderful friends in my orbit. Scheduling separate dates in which to catch up was daunting. I came up with a grand plan; I would hold regular sojourns at a wine bar. After booking the room, I panicked. I forgot I had a social phobia, rehashing all the silly things I had said, and worrying if people had a good time at every party I had held. What if nobody showed up? What if I didn’t receive any RSVP’s? My heart beat wildly as I sent out the invite to folks, many of whom I hadn’t seen in a year. Some had experienced major life changes. I tried to think of people who would get along. I was too scared to look at my Facebook event for some time, and was delighted to see that many friends were able to come.

I got to the wine bar early with a friend, and we settled on a silver sofa in the beautiful art-deco room. We chatted and ordered a drink as the minutes ticked by. Suddenly, friends started arriving, one after the other. I had to hold back tears as I embraced those who meant the world to me, but whom life had kept apart. I was introduced to the lovely man a friend had begun dating, and it was thrilling to see how he treated her. The mood was casual and joyous, and I went around the room slowly, as friends tabled their stories for my eager ears. The stories were brimming with hope and new beginnings.

We laughed and ate and were generally merry. I was in awe of a lady who had arranged to come with someone I have known for years. This friend couldn’t attend due to illness, and so she came alone. How brave is it to put yourself out there amongst unfamiliar faces?  Everyone mingled and I loved how open the crowd was with each other. No sticking to the friend you came with, or those you knew. One of those gathered organized the pianist in the decadent central room to sing David Bowie songs and we sank into velvet sofas as we chilled. It was something else, to hear a 1920’s chanteuse belting out Ground Control to Major Tom. It was 1am by the time we finished hugging one another and slinked out into the night.

friends at wine bar

It can be hard to catch up with individual friends, but gathering many precious souls together can be achieved and is something I recommend. I plan to do it time and again. The threads of friendship are like spun gold; so very precious. It doesn’t matter how much time has passed with friendship of the everlasting kind. You simply pick up where you left off. The night of this dinner party, I felt a wave of love throughout the room.  It takes courage to organize such an event, and I came to realize that those who are meant to be there, shall be present. I can’t wait until the next sojourn! People’s lives are complicated and crazy-busy. For one precious night, it is laid at the door, and a meeting of minds and hearts takes place. It is enough to sustain you through another year.

Wine bars for grown-ups are making a resurgence. It is a different vibe from a noisy, chaotic pub. You can get dressed up, and talk to those assembled, rather than shouting. We left this venue, with the confirmation that life can be full of lyrical laughter and those who have our backs.